Normal service now resumed....

She wanted to get some things off her chest. DONE! And now for a catch-up (another one!).

* There were two dates with the friend's friend from work. A no comment would probably be kindest. Though she did discover the utter wonderousness of wasabi peanuts, so that can't be all bad.

* She got the date with the Guardian Soulmates guy. You know Mr Schuester from Glee? Imagine that. Now imagine him as gay, awkward, making inappopriate comments and without the general beauty of Mr Schu's face. He had a phobia of tea and a cat called Mo-Fo. This is not a joke. You may, or may not, be surprised that she had to drink her way through it. Mojitos and red, red wine.

* Finally, FINALLY she figured that Future Husband probably isn't future husband if he has a girlfriend. Subtle clue, but she just about figured it out. He is coming to the birthday party to end all birthday parties in the coming weeks, and she has rather embarassingly sent a few drunken texts (albeit restrained ones. no kisses counts as restrained, right?) but it's probably all okay. Except she is, however, a tad concerned about the fact that on Friday night on a flashing dancefloor, she told FH's uni friend she intended to marry FH. Said friend (who came home with her flatmate, fact fans! wooop!) then sent text to FH. She is worried. Needlessly? We'll see.

* Now for the fun stuff. On said flashing dancefloor, when lovely flatmate was otherwise engaged, after a free shot of Sambucca she started talking to a boy in a red t-shirt. Or he started talking to her, the details are a tad hazy. We shall call him Irish (for that is his name) and we will be a little bit excited that they then had an ace chat on Saturday and that they are going for a wee drinkie on Wednesday night - a pre-weekend to make up for her covering the whole of England for work for the whole of Easter. Actually, and at last, a date she is really looking forward to. Nothing might happen. But you know, it's a possibility, an outside shot, that something just might. Did she mention his accent? Oh, the ACCENT....

LLx

One

Singleness is a strange thing. Its boundaries morph and change, a formless shapeshifting being that can make you feel like you're dancing on a beach one minute and trying to keep afloat in the sea the next. It is terrifying at times, and wonderful for exactly the same reason - because you are, absolutely and completely, forced with figuring out the youness of you. No-one to bolster you or throw out a lifebelt. It takes a little while to remember you do not need it and actually revel in the freedom, the bliss of singleness. There are stages, of course... the utter joy and release, the messiness of the rebound, the fun, the dates, the not-wanting-someone, the not-not-wanting-someone, the wanting someone, the not-actually-caring-eitherway and then this. A kind of contentment. And the realisation that perhaps the person best equipped to save yourself is you - you can swim.

Catch up!

Here is the news (shuffles papers authoratively, composes face Fiona Bruce style. But with less pointy ears)...

BONG! She is still single - but then you guessed that, right? But seriously, only a few more months and she could do a Hephzibah Anderson.

BONG! The Christmas party was a little dull but then she couldn't drink as she was being interviewed on national radio the next morning, live!

BONG! She ended the kissing drought at new year by kissing firstly another friend's sure thing by accident (oops) and then a 7ft tall Kiwi Edinburgh rugby player.

BONG! The inappropriate Uni Boy crush is well and truly over and she feels a little mortified about the whole thing.

BONG! She is being pursued by a farmer type with whom she had a really fun evening out when it was a friend's birthday, but he lives about three hours away. And has a small child. Which is kind of a new thing for her....

BONG! She has been set up by her lovely friend A with a work colleague... we'll call him Charlie. They went out on Friday and had fillet steak, wine, and talk about two-letter Scrabble words. It was fun. They're meeting again this week - more developments on this story to follow.

BONG! She grudgingly went back on Soulmates after lovely friend L met a guy on there she has now started dating. An enterprising type got his email address to her without her subscribing and, after an initial confusion making his email think she was spam, they are now conversing.

BONG! Is it so wrong to go on multiple dates? They do it on SATC all the time!

BONG! Digressing. Anyway. EVERYONE seems to want to set her up with someone at the moment. Is this what happens after you've been single 18 months? Or is it that "nearly 30" tattoo on her head?

AND FINALLY....
She has met her future husband. Oh, did I not mention that at the beginning? How remiss of her. Technically they met 10 years ago, but don't properly know each other. Anyhow. They met again, through a bizarre series of coincidences, last weekend. And could not stop talking to each other. And she has not felt like this in what seems like aeons. So, even if nothing were to happen she admits begrudgingly, she'd always have the memory of that fluttery, ooh it's-97-and-I've-just-done-poppers-for-the-first-and-last-time feeling in her head that FH brought about. What, I hear you ask, is the problem? A girlfriend. He has a girlfriend. But of course.

Hope you're all feeling suitably informed! Those are, of course, just the headlines. Detailed briefing later. She promises not to leave it another three months!

Like a phoenix from the flames....

Gosh, has it been so long? She is blushing at the complete lack of blogging in her life of late. There was a bit of a lull, granted, but she kind of got sidetracked by life in various guises. But now she has many tales to tell, hurrah! And is hoping for many more to be created in the coming months (in a film, this would be the cue for an OTT wink). Double hurrah!
Let the wild rumpus begin...
LLx

Red, red wine...

So, Sartre said that hell is other people. Actually, I think it was "L'enfer, c'est les autres" - but it's a passable translation.
She would like to amend this, however. Turns out hell is other people... coming outside at the moment when The London Loves is JUST about to be kissed by Uni Boy after a night full-t0-bursting of flirting. A little bit of luck would be appreciated!
It was a brilliant night, fuelled with cheap red wine (which, it has to be said, she didn't appreciate quite so much the next morning. Or afternoon, for that matter). Lots of fun with lots of old uni friends. Okay, it was meant to be a networking event - they just chose to network with each other, that's all!
What was slightly curious was that, after she walked in late and said hello to a friend she'd not seen for a while, said friend (who was a little more than friends with her at uni shall we say...) immediately turned around to fetch Uni Boy. And announce The London Love's arrival. Interesting. He looked massively pleased to see her (for those of you with dirty minds - shame on you) and they proceeded to chat for most of the evening.
"Chat" in this instance meaning "flirt quite outrageously". The talk wasn't just flirty, it turned downright dirty, the blame for which she is laying fairly and squarely at his door. But it WAS kind of fun.
They all left the bar, feeling slightly worse for wear, and headed (okay, swayed) to another pub. And it was here, dear readers, when they were illictly smoking outside, that there was very definitely a moment. And not, if you've been watching Miranda on BBC2, a made-up moment. Nope, this was a bona-fide, realer-than-real, okay-she-can't-remember-completely-she-was-that-drunk-but-nonetheless MOMENT (possibly with gropage. DAMN that red wine).
And then.... friend #2 walked out. Let's hope Uni Boy hadn't had to send him a "save me" text! Shit. He hadn't had to send him a "save me" text, had he??? We'll assume not, as Uni Boy's still talking to her. But as far as the night went, that was indeed that.
Are things really meant to be this frustrating??? All part of the rich tapestry of life and all that. Sigh. It's been pointed out to her that dating is also about the dry spells, but really, is it meant to last quite this long? She even read somewhere how it's meant to be about "spiritual enlightenment" and "finding yourself" when you're busy being single. Sod that.
In other news (which she needs to distract her from Uni Boy) - the Famous Five boy from work is newly single apparently. Woo hoo! Bring on the work christmas party, and quite possibly the strapless black dress with s+m overtones she saw in the shops this weekend...

Rules

These are the rules. She will be amazing tomorrow. Funny, friendly, freckly, down to earth, a little bit sexy but not scarily so. We’re talking lip gloss and masses of mascara, rather than buckets of eyeliner here and ample amounts of boobage. She will have a drink in her hand at most times but she will not, note NOT, be drunk. Not until the post-drinks-drinks, that is. She will have lots of great things to talk about, and will make it sound like she has done a lot more fiction writing than she has. If there are any exceptionally good-looking men there she will be chatty but slightly aloof and mysterious. Her legs will look fantastic. She will stand up most of the time to maximise that. She will network relentlessly and get lots of people's cards which she probably won't ever end up using. She will exude confidence, intelligence and wit, with a little bit of minx-ness thrown in for good measure. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES WILL SHE TRY TO FLIRT WITH UNI BOY.

Non-date #2

Or.. the continuing saga of The London Loves and Uni Boy


Hmmm. Perhaps "saga" makes it out to be something more than it is. But here's the thing. She went out to see the documentary with him last night and had an amazing amazing time! Everything is there. He's such a great guy (yeah okay... pass the sick bucket etc), they're so chatty together, and it was a lot of fun. Why then, can't she get her head around the fact that, for now at least, they're just friends?

She realises that talking about this does very much make her appear like someone on a trailer for He's Just Not That Into You Too (which has to be the name of the sequel, right? Slightly grammatically wrong but I'm sure that won't bother them too much). It is an unfortunate by-product of this whole situation. With that little warning, let her dissect the non-date. Okay, last time when she said there was no chemistry, no fireworks? That may have been a teeny lie. Or he was having a bad day, whatever. Because this time? Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee-BANG (that's her best approximation of a Catherine Wheel, btw. Do bear with her, it's been a busy week).

Then somehow, within 10 minutes they were talking about porn. Writing it, that is, for money, rather than just talking filth. Um. But still. What's that all about? Luckily it was time to go in for the film then so that particular line of conversation wasn't followed! She had to try a little bit to concentrate on the film, but it was good. They had sensibly gone for "middle" when asked where they wanted to sit, though she did notice a cheeky look and eyebrow raise from Uni Boy when the nice cinema lady said "back row".

And then there was dinner, in which her internal temperature managed to rocket up to about 50C creating a rather special "glowy" look to her face. Beacon-like, it may more accurately have been described. Girls? Sometimes there is such a thing as TOO SPICY and TOO MANY LAYERS OF CLOTHES. A valuable winter lesson for us all.

Ooh she forgot to say, thanks to the Twitter friends for advice on clothes to wear (twitter.com/thelondonloves for anyone who's not on there!). She went for - skinny jeans, grey fake-Uggs (fuggs?), slightly low cut top, scarf and coat. Oh and a floaty cardigan. Hence the overheating. Was not just proximity to the boy, honest gov. Apart from the temperature issues, it was mostly a good look. She may have shamefully slightly leaned over the table a few times too. That's allowed, right?

And what did they talk about? Everything. Anything. Lots! They talked about buggering off to India for Christmas. Together. About writing, about life, about love. He's only just ended a relationship, and it lasted for quite a few months - but hey, at least this could explain why she hadn't seen him much! He seems every-so-slightly bitter as a result, although that could well be sex deprivation symptoms, if she's reading him as well as she thinks! Oh dear.

Which could end up leaving her in a bit of a pickle. Being friends is one thing - they get on so well and they've known each other for years. Being "special friends" is not somewhere she wants to go, thanks very much. He's adamant he wants to get "very drunk" at a uni meet up thing, appropriately enough, the week after next. And equally adamant that he wants her to be there, and to go out somewhere afterwards.

And that is where we leave them, him giving her a kiss (on the cheek!) on the Tube as she saunters off in search of a little air conditioning.

It was a great night. However, she's having difficulty reading this. What about you?